50 Facts About Me Challenge

So a while back I was tagged by the lovely Keisha and Tanya to do the 50 facts about me challenge. I've been pretty busy recently so I've only just had time to sit down and do it. So here are 50 facts about me, some might be pretty well known whereas others are things that I don't really mention and aren't known by many at all.

1. My full legal name is Alexander James Collwyn Campbell MacKenzie, and I'm not even sure if I've spelt them all right. I go by the name Alex Sykes because part of my family had the name as their maiden name and I think it flows nicer and is a lot easier to pronounce and spell correctly.
2. I'm 5 ft 11 and a lot of the time I wish I was a little shorter. I have weird knees so it's quite difficult sometimes to bend down and grab stuff, despite being very physically fit and good at running I'm awful with anything that involves bending down or squatting.
3. I use music a lot of the time as a way to escape from bad moods and it is true that music is integral in giving happiness. I have a vast amount of music on my iPhone of all genres, and I always have it with me so I can always listen to the music that suits my mood.
4. I have a thing for quite a few celebrities. Beyoncé is an utter babe and I love her as a musician and as a person, I've seen her live before and she was blow away and I would love to go and see her again. Rita Ora is another celebrity who I have the utmost respect for, she's an absolutely lovely person and I think she's absolutely stunning and really cute. Guilty pleasure is Harry Styles as well, I don't really like One Direction's music but I respect them for how far they have come. Harry Styles was born on the same day as me and we're the same height, and he's gorgeous so I like to think I am too because of that, haha!
5. One of my biggest idols and inspirations was Steve Jobs, who founded Apple. Steve Jobs changed the world and went through everything without letting it get the better of him; from companies constantly stealing his ideas and becoming more successful than him for it. Despite all of that Apple has become the most valuable company in the world and is seeing worldwide expansion and massive profit. Even though I didn't know Steve Jobs personally I miss him, he was a modern day genius and it is sad that cancer took him from this world.
6. On that basis I'm a huge Apple fan, not just because of their products but because of their entire company philosophy and ideals. Apple is a company who believes in protecting the environment and its workers. They do a lot in China to try and ensure their workers are looked after, despite the difficulty caused by the poor treatment given by factory management. Apple is also a leader in the field due to the fact they stick to what they develop and do not do the petty and childish thing that Samsung and Microsoft do by bashing the competition at any given basis. Apple invented graphical user interfaces, which is something everyone forgets and gives Microsoft credit for, and Apple invented the modern day smartphone, which is also something that is often forgotten.
7. I'm a buddhist. I found buddhism when I was suffering the worst of my depression (more on that next). I found the teachings of Buddha to be something that I was really interested in, and the ideology of buddhism in general promotes peace and tranquility. Meditation is also something that helps me feel at peace and can remove negative feelings completely and help me have the best sleep ever.
8. I have suffered for as long as I can remember with depression and anxiety. I decided to pluck up the courage and seek support back in 2013, and since then I've come such a long way. It's helped me understand why I have always been terrified of being in public and why I sometimes had suicidal thoughts. From seeking out help over it I am now to this day a sufferer but I do not allow it to get in the way of my life and I find myself feeling a lot more positive on a day to day basis.
9. I have a passion for animals. For as long as I could remember I had a beautiful black and white cat called Fluffs who was always my little angel. She sadly died from lung failure in 2013 and to be honest I have tears in my eyes right now just writing this. I have had my border collie, River, since early 2014 and he has changed my entire families life. He is there for me when I feel upset and comes and cuddles up to me, and he does the cutest things. This has lead to me becoming a volunteer for the Border Collie Trust and on a monthly basis I attend events around the Midlands to raise funding for the beautiful collies that are waiting for their forever home in our kennels.
10. On that basis, since February 2015, I assisted in a business venture by family friend and lead coordinator of volunteers to begin with an expansion plan for a small company called Stan's Pals Ltd. I was appointed as a director when the company became incorporated and I am currently working as a dog walker and developer of our brand new website, which I'm hoping to launch soon.
11. I've always been an overly friendly person, but I'm often misunderstood. I feel happy about myself when I feel as though I have made at least someone feel better on a daily basis. I feel really upset and down if I'm not able to do that, and it's one of my weaknesses. I also become really insulted and hurt if someone says something negative to me when I've done my best to make them feel better about themselves.
12. I struggle to reply to people all the time. I find myself always really busy, even if I'm not doing too much. I was never popular in my schooldays and had only one friend. Now I get a lot of people talking to me on a daily basis as well as quite a few people I class as really good friends. I tend to focus on people I communicate regularly with and then find I don't reply to others until weeks later, which makes me feel bad because I'd hate for people to think I'm ignorant.
13. I'm really conscious about my health. I've been exercising daily for many years, even if it's just something small as walking around aimlessly for half an hour. I'm in pretty good shape but I do have a few times where I feel disgusted in my body, but I think this is due to expectations that I'm trying to rush. I want to have a toned body with a slight six pack and bigger biceps and triceps, but I need to realise I can't just get that overnight and to not belittle the progress I've made already.
14. I have an obsession with having my hair big and unique, I love it when my hair turns out great and I hate it when it gets wet or is flat. I have however been trying to improve my general mood by not having it up and going out with it pushed back or in a beanie.
15. I have had a lot of piercings throughout the years. I've had 3 lobes on both of my ears, had angelbites, snakebites and spider bites  I've also had a smiley piercing that got stuck in food and ripped out when I was eating (ouch!). I've removed most and now only have 5 piercings, but they are my favourite to be honest. I have the left of my nose done, snakebites, and both of my nipples done. I took my 18mm stretcher out a month ago and I already miss it, but I don't want it to be healed and be an ugly hole in the future. It's shrinking nicely now but seeing people with stretchers does make me tempted to put mine back in.
16. I had my first tattoo when I was 19. This was a rather large half sleeve tattoo that was made on the basis of my own design. I absolutely love it, and only wish that I could afford to have my other arm done, and also that it was acceptable by most jobs to have visible tattoos so I could have a whole full sleeve.
17. I have a really embarrassing tattoo on one of my right fingers. Me and my friend did it when we were drunk, and all these years later it is just a faded mess on my finger. I'm hoping to eventually have enough disposable money to have a small hieroglyph or my first name is cyrillic script to cover it, which will still mean it is not visible as it only appears when I take photographs, which is one of the main reasons I am embarrassed by it.
18. I've had a lot of body modifications, but my biggest one had to be my nose job, which I had done in 2012. I was told that I may suffer from body dysmorphia disorder, as I never took any photos without covering my nose, and I constantly felt terrified and like I was being stared at whenever I was out in public and people were standing to my side. I had my nose done by one of the top surgeons in London, and he did an amazing job. People often like to bash cosmetic surgery, but my rhinoplasty not only improved my look, but also helped me develop socially and mentally. I am so happy I took the courage to have such a big thing done, and I now show my face in pride and never feel as though I am being analysed in a negative way by anyone I meet.
19. I love technology and I'm sort of a geek for computers. I built my own computer and have upgraded all the internal parts over the years. When I take the side off my computer I am absolutely fascinated in all the components that make up a computer. I'm also good with software, and I want my chosen career to be in software development and engineering. I want to devote my life to being able to work with code and develop amazing software so I may eventually be recognised by Apple and be employed as an iOS Developer.
20. I am an extremely open minded person. I have a lot of friends from many backgrounds and circumstances. One of my best friends is transgender and I love them to bits, I'm fiercely loyal and become extreme angry when someone tries to belittle them for this. I'm also passionate about equality for men and women; equality for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender persons; and also believe that people should not be abused over the religion they follow, as it is only extremists who portray Islam in a bad light.
21. I used to have a drink problem, spending about £30-50 a week on alcohol and getting so drunk I couldn't even walk. I've cut down a hell of a lot over the last year, and although I drink a lot occasionally, I really enjoy drinking exotic soft drinks and alcohol free cocktails. The only time I enjoy drinking is when I'm celebrating and in the company of friends.
22. My diet is really strange. I'm picking up the willpower to cut down on fat intake, but I also avoid lactose in certain products, but love it in others. I transitioned to Soya for my coffee and tea this year and I'm enjoying it a lot more than milk. I also use Lacto-free cheese whenever I have a toasty.
23. I am obsessed with herbal teas and tea in general! I get so excited when I can go into the kitchen and make a tea. Sound so typically British.
24. I really want to join the gym, but I really don't fancy going alone.
25. I bought my first ever car outright in December 2014, and now three months later it is completely different to how it was when I got it! I've done extensive modifications in terms of appearance, so it looks identical to the higher end hot hatch of the year; the Ford Fiesta ST.
26. I'm really enjoy classical music and love to watch and listen to friends who play instruments. I find it a really attractive talent.
27. I like to sing in the car when I'm on my own, and I end up screaming to high note songs and I forget that I usually drive with the driver's window down.
28. I want to be really active, but at times I can be extremely lazy. Sometimes I don't get up until midday, although this is a lot better than in the past when I sometimes slept until late afternoon or early evening.
29. I have a sleep problem, which might account to why I feel so drained often. I always try to get eight hours rest every night, but sometimes I cannot for the life of me get to sleep before 2-3AM and this is usually days when I have to be up at 7AM.
30. I have pretty poor eyesight at times, yet I have 20:20 vision when tested with my contacts in, but I still find myself struggling to make out people if they're not that close to me.
31. When I was a child I decided to try and walk across the kitchen counter, unfortunately I stood on a sheet of paper and cracked my head open on the kitchen floor. I still have some small scars in places around my hair that show.
32. It sounds sad but I treat my iPhone like it is literally my offspring. I treat my iPhone like a child and always buy the best screen protectors for both the front and back of the phone and replace them often. Despite the fact I change iPhone every year I am proud to own one and it is always with me.
33. I love driving and passed my driving test when I was only four months in to being seventeen. I have had two incidents where my car has been damaged, and both of these weren't my fault. I have definitely noticed over the years how careless drivers can be and this has resulted in me adapting better to other people's mistakes.
34. I've been growing my hair for a long time. I used to have it bright red in 2011/2012 and I lost my entire fringe and a lot of the length from the rest of it. It's growing extremely well and I'm happy with the length and volume I can get from it nowadays.
35. I'm a very neutral person in terms of design preference. I absolutely LOVE black and white! For technology I will always buy the darkest option; such as Space Grey with my Apple products, but when it comes to cars and clothing I always choose white. When I designed my room I also had a mix and match of black and white colour schemes, and I feel so comfortable when I'm surrounded by this scheme.
36. I study law at University, but anyone who has known me a while probably wonders why as I have an amazing ability with technology. When I was about ten I used to go on my dad's old CRT Dell system, and I used to amaze him (and annoy!) by the way I ended up modifying Windows system files and writing up code. I'll be completing my Law degree and then jumping straight on to a Computer Science degree for the next three years.
37. My parents were told they were unlikely to ever have children, and that they were becoming too old to have children. They often tell me that I am a miracle child.
38. I've always lived in Swadlincote, but I've travelled a lot through the train network and by car. I've been to a lot more places in the UK when compared to my parents. 
39. My parents took me on many holidays, and I think my first holiday was when I was 1 or 2 and it was to Corfu.
40. My parents own a house in Spain, which I helped them decide on. I haven't been abroad for years though, as I find it stressful to fly and I prefer the quiet time I can get on my own at home.
41. I really like taking selfies when I feel I look nice, but most of the time I end up taking about 50 photos and then only like one or two...
42. I used to have swimming lessons when I was a young child, and I have about 20 badges for different swimming awards. Apparently I'm a really strong swimmer. 
43. I can be so clumsy sometimes, in the past I've left my phone in a supermarket (luckily some kind old lady caught up to me and gave it me), I've driven off with a Costa coffee on my room and reversed to have it splatter down my windscreen, and I've walked into lampposts and glass patio doors because I tend to drift off into my own reality sometimes.
44. I can drink loads of spirits and not even feel remotely drunk, yet if I drink a few glasses of wine or cider it'll hit me within a few minutes!
45. I've spent years making myself comfortable with how I look and the person I am, I used to hate myself and I used to hate how I look. I feel like I've come a long way and I'm extremely happy with the person I am today.
46. I absolutely love candles. If I can have candles on then I will, scented are my favourite! If I have a bath I tend to have a range of different candles with different smells, which most people found overpowering, but I personally find it so tranquil and I feel totally relaxed!
47. I'm really forgiving of people, mainly because I don't like people disliking me or disliking people myself. I'm extremely easygoing and laid back and I want my life to be as stress-free and no conflict as much as possible, however if someone really upsets my family or friends then I can become an absolute bitch and can be violent.
48. I really like family time, as long as it's in moderation. I'm really happy that my family eats around a table on the sofa and we watch a lot of the same programmes. We have a lot of intellectual conversations and my parents are interested in a few things that I am interested in but with different opinions and views, making for heated debated sometimes.
49. I'm extremely romantic, or I would be if I had someone to be romantic with. My idea of a perfect night is cuddling up with someone I really like in bed watching a horror, having cute kisses at unexpected times, going for cute dates to restaurants and the cinema, and just in general being affectionate and feeling like someone truly cares for me. I have close relationships with some of my friends and I enjoy doing these things with them if I know they won't take it in the wrong way.
50. I'm really fussy about grammar and English. I get really annoyed for little reason if I see something small that has a grammatical mistake in, despite the fact my grammar isn't always perfect in itself. I have noticed some mistakes and the use of the wrong 'your/you're' on my university website and I have made complaints in the past.

So there you go, I would tag others to do this, but I don't particularly know anyone else who has a blog and hasn't already done it. I hope whoever reads this at least feels that some of these facts are interesting. Thanks for taking your time to read them!

Self Reflection

Recently I've been reflecting upon myself, and I think I've made a really big realisation; something that's been present for over a year, but I've never actually acted upon it.

Truth is, I like law in terms of knowledge and as an interest, but I've realised the possible prospect of working in the legal career is not something that I want. My dad has been working with his computer as part of his job as being an OCR examiner, and he often asks for my input and assistance with working with the software and also gaining 'an expert opinion' with regard to the questions that are offered in the ICT papers he marks. The more he asks me to do this the more I realise I have an unrivalled natural talent with computer science that I have been trying to push away in favour of my law degree.

The reality of this is also that I've managed to look at things and have lost sleep over it. I chose law because of the financial aspect; I'll admit I've always been a materialistic person, and being able to afford the finer things in life have always been really important to me. I turned 21 seven days ago, and I've now realised that in reality you should always consider when deciding on your future what you love and not what has the biggest pay cheque... I don't want to work in the legal field, and that is what I've just realised. It's bad timing to realise this, considering in 10 weeks time I'm graduating as an LLB student and will have £27,000 of debt to pay back for my law course.

I now know that my passion always has been, and always will be, with computers and software. I recall when I was about 7 I used to drive my dad insane by modifying system files and mastering his old Dell CRT computer system, and up until college I was constantly advancing in my knowledge of technology. I think multiple factors have hindered my realisation of what my true passion and talent is however; my school always saw me as 'stupid', which was evident by the fact I was put into the bottom set for IT and was learning how to make text bold, which is something I was taught when I was 8 years old!

Whilst studying my law degree I entered the university almost losing my father due to heart failure that was unrecognised by the NHS for over five years. I guess this was a contributing factor to becoming more knowledgeable in the law, I always felt that the NHS should be held liable for the stress and trauma that my family endured at the time, and still endures to this day. On the other hand, this also restricted me from realising my true talent, as I was fixated on this and with all the drama that was happening at home my mind was able to be on a straight path and realise what was logical. I was diagnosed with depression just five months into my first year, and this again hindered me in thinking correctly and making sense of the grand scope of things.

This week I made a big decision, which also sees strides forward with regard to my anxiety. I took the initiative to contact the university career advice service, and here I was understood completely and pushed myself to put my passion for computing across face to face with someone else; not fearing whether they though you were a 'nerd' or you were a 'know-it-all'. The lovely adviser who saw me told me that she could see why I was so frustrated and feeling down recently; that the true fact of the matter was I was studying a degree that I had no intention of specialising in upon graduation. It was here that multiple options were discussed, and that a big decision was made which seems to be less daunting than the alternative.

I will be applying for the Computer Science course with the Open University after this summer, at the cost of £15,000 which I will have to pay out of savings for a house. This is no problem however, as I know that this is something that will result in me moving towards the path of life I wish to enter. A part of the advisor meeting also revealed that someone such as me, with such passion for computing and software development, could be looking at a six figure salary, which would be equal and even surpass what I would be looking to get with becoming a solicitor. 

I will set out to work part time and complete a three year Computer Science degree from later in this year. I know this will remove me from the financial I have currently over my peers, but computing is my passion and I do not wish to let this go.

My advice, for anyone who is considering going to university and is still not certain as to what they want to do, is to consider what your true talent is. I am a true believer that everyone is born with an extraordinary talent, and that they can change the world and make big changes if they follow their passion. Do not make the same mistake I did; that you could make a lot more money by going into a professional career like law, etc. This will not work out in the long run; you will be unhappy and although you may have loads of money, you wouldn't get the same enjoyment from life you would get from doing what you are passionate about.

Car Update

So I wrote in my last post that my car was my pride and joy and that I was in the progress of being upgraded, and I've just got it back and had the opportunity to get some images of it. So this is just a quick post to show the car with all the updates. In my opinion it looks a lot sleeker now and definitely has that sporty profile!

Weekly Update

So this week just gone by I returned to university for the first time since before Christmas. I took part in a training session to prepare me for a placement I will be taking somewhere in Derby that deals with legal proceedings. 

Monday was pretty much the worst day I have had in a while; I had to sit an important exam, I had to do a presentation for the placement module, and finally had to do an interview with one of my peers and we both struggled to function by that time so they ended up being quite humorous! By the time I got home I was literally shattered... but it kinda gave me a sign of relief having got this out of the way and now only going back to my daily routine of university and study, without any of the stress of exams or assignments for the near future.

Rest of the week was a bit of an up and down thing. Sold some of my old shoes on eBay not long ago, and turns out the buyer wasn't happy with them so I'm £50 down once again, however I managed to sell my old TV for £602 and this has been great for relieving some of the financial pressure my bank account is currently suffering.

Oh yeah, I also decided to have my nose done - something I wanted done for quite a while but I was somewhat hesitant as I didn't know much about aftercare, however I have to say it was one of the least painful piercings I have ever had and its just as easy to care for as the rest of my piercings and doesn't bother my airway or nose in any way. I'm really happy with it! 

Nose piercing looks on point!

I've finally finished my new room layout, with the final piece of furniture arriving Friday afternoon, and in my opinion it has completely transformed that corner of the room. Lying in bed now makes me feel a lot more relaxed just by the fact that every direction I look is comfortable and to my style now. The new TV and the PS4 I recently got have also been amazing for stress relief and unwinding after long days out of the house.

My room feels more homely than ever before

This weekend I'm just taking things easy - went for a run today and braved trying to run with River, and he seemed to enjoy it a lot as he could go at a pace he wasn't always used to, being a border collie however he is a high energy dog and he definitely loved being able to flat out run through pathways by my side for a couple of miles.

Tomorrow I'll be having my mechanical pride and joy upgraded at last! My Fez is booked in to have a full body-kit, rear spoiler, and dual exhaust system fitted and this will be done by the end of the day. This past week I have also had the interior changed and upgraded slightly with red ambient foot-wells fitted and sporty aluminium pedals installed. My car is my most expensive asset at the moment, and being given the opportunity to have it exactly how I want it before my birthday is something I'm extremely happy with!

Small interior upgrades that make a big difference to ambience

Hopes for next week are that I get re-introduced to my university modules again, and start to crack down on what is now the final 12 weeks of my degree. I also hope to be able to see some of my closest and best friends, who always put a smile on my face and brighten my days.

I hope everyone else is enjoying 2015 as much as I am, things do seem a lot different to 2014 and, for the first time in a while, I feel as though a lot of positive things might occur in my life this year! 

New Year, A Big Year

I haven't updated my blog in a while - the truth is I find myself often very busy and unable to focus on things as easily as I could in the past. I enter my final semester of my LLB degree next week and with an exam looming on Monday I have been extremely dedicated to my studies.

It's only the 9th of January and I'm already extremely optimistic for this year. In the last 10 days a lot has already been accomplished. I'll start with the three main goals I have set myself for 2015, all of which I am already beginning to make a start on:-

• Education - I am now at crucial stage within my academic 'career', of which will very shortly be coming to an end. I have spent a majority of my life going from school, college, and then transitioning to university in 2012. All these years on I am now at a stage where I am on track to gain a 2:2 or 2:1 projected degree in Law, in just 12 weeks I will finish my degree and be awaiting graduation... The looming month of May 2015 will approach quite rapidly, and this will complete a milestone of my academic and future life: I will be one third of the way to becoming a solicitor. I am currently working on an application to study the Legal Practice Course from September and become registered with the Solicitor Regulatory Authority. I therefore have sat down and taken a good hard reflection on all of this and decided that I will significantly increase the amount of time I dedicate to study - these next twelve weeks will define the standard of my degree and I intend to work around the clock to achieve the best possible result.

• Health & Fitness - I have always considered myself a rather healthy person. In 2013 I was rather scrawny and lacked much body definition. Since beginning exercising on an almost daily basis in 2014 I have seen my body and overall health transform before my eyes. This year I have already made steps towards improving this even further; including going for a long jog multiple times a week with my mother in the early hours of the morning. This has already improved my stamina and made my overall body image appear more lean. I have also been sticking to a regulated eating programme since November 2013, and have only improved over time in keeping my fat intake down, whilst my carbohydrate intake is higher and my protein intake is high. Overall I have found this has assisted me in a lot of ways - from feeling more positive about myself, to also improving my sleeping pattern. All of this considered I still suffer from mental health problems, my anxiety and depression continues to be present, despite the fact I often try to tell myself they are no longer there. I have made great improvements in this field however, having gradually come off medication to the point now where I am no longer having to take a tablet every day just to feel as though I can cope. I intend to use my improved health and the many positive things that have come my way, and the future projected improvements to my life, to make a stand against my depression and make it clear that it may be a part of me currently, but I won't let it control my life any more.

• Socialisation - A big part of overcoming the problem I mentioned with my depression and anxiety is in becoming more socialised. 2015 will be a year where I intend to improve friendships with existing friends and improve bonds with them, but also attempt to get to know new people and hopefully have more people in my life who I can trust and feel comfortable around. In the last 10 days I have already been to a new years party where I have become close to someone I was friends with before, but didn't particularly talk to on a regular basis, and I have also been out with my best friend and got to know her sister a lot better. Getting to know these wonderful people reminds me that I should not be so closed minded and set on not letting new people into my life, and that there are others out there who are as genuine and amazing as some of my long established best friends.

That moves on to less ongoing steps that I have been achieved, or I intend will be achieved this year. In December I purchased my own legally registered car, after being in a dual ownership state on cars for several years. Although insurance is rather high, due to the unfortunate immoral attitude of a lot of drivers on UK roads, but I am now finally on a high mileage insurance policy which will allow me to travel a lot and have more freedom. The car I purchase was my most expensive purchase to date, having cost me £11,000. I am so proud of this asset however whenever I see or drive it. My Ford Fiesta Titanium X Sport is an absolutely beautiful and reliable car, and despite being quite punchy engine wise, the running costs are extremely low with it being tax exempt and having high mpg. 

My new pride and joy

Another (currently ongoing) change I have made the last week is a slight reshuffle of my room. My computer was upgraded quite significantly for Christmas, having an 8GB SLi Graphic set up installed and a 4k monitor purchased. My desk space has been expanded so it now feels like a professional office; which has added the feel for a positive work environment and helped me to focus more on work related tasks. My room itself feels a lot bigger now that I have moved my bed towards the edge of the room, and I have also sold my old TV and purchased a 4k Smart TV to be able to relax and future proof my entertainment system. I am hoping to have Freesat by Sky installed within the next month so that I have access to a much larger array of stations, which will be wonderful for just lying in bed after hard days at university and enjoying my favourite TV programmes in ultra high definition. 

New room layout - dedicated office space and new entertainment area for relaxation

It will be my birthday in February, and I will be spending it with some of my closest friends, and I will also be full steam ahead with regards to my final semester by then. I am extremely excited for the prospects of what this year will bring. I don't think I could wish for anything more at this point. My next aim is to be able to afford to move to Derby, either renting or purchasing outright, but this isn't very likely at the moment due to the amount of funds needed for such a big change. We are still awaiting legal proceedings, and if it is found within my families favour, and the fact that I have suffered greatly within the last three years is rectified, then I may be finally ready and in a position to move out by the end of the year, making it a lot easier to continue with my studies in Derby and also be a lot closer to most of my friends.

15 Things I'm Grateful For

Mama Mawer tagged me in a post where she posted about what she was grateful for, although I have been rather busy I now find myself with enough spare time to at least attempt to return to my blog and make time for it once again, so I'll bring back my blog with this post.

Here is a list of 15 things that I am grateful for:-

1. Apple

I am grateful for Apple and Steve Jobs' genius, both as a consumer and someone who is interested in technology. Apple has not always historically been known as one of the most successful and valuable technology companies in the world, but from my interest in technology I know full well how they have influenced the world of technology and changed how every single one of us live. Apple invented the mouse and the graphical user interface, giving easy to use computing to the general market. I began with an older iMac which was a joy to use, and in 2014 I now own a retina display MacBook Pro and a 5K iMac, which I would never have even believed to be possible 10 years ago, and they make it an absolute pleasure to be typing this right now. Not just that there is also the iPhone, which introduced the first multitouch display to the world and I have been proud to have owned every generation since the iPhone 2G debuted and created the smartphone market in 2007, I am now using an iPhone 6 which is an absolute pleasure to use for a multitude of tasks. Along with that is also my iPad, which I have also owned since joining university, and thanks to how productive and well refined they are I now use an iPad Air 2 which seriously makes amazing things possible, such as watching Netflix in the back of the car or working on an assignment in a cafe.

My trusty 2009 iMac, iPad Air 2 and iPhone 6 - all make my life 100x easier!

2. Family

I am grateful to have a supporting family, and although we may not always get along and we have our fair share of arguments, I do not know what I would do without them. We have all been suffering the last few years, and I think if it wasn't for our support for each other we would not still be here. My father suffered heart failure in 2012 after years of misdiagnosis, and even now in 2014 it still seems like the NHS is failing him, such as him being the wrong medication the other day which would have killed him if he had taken it. With my support as a law student, and my mother as a social services worker, we have managed to stay strong together and tackle this head-on instead of being left to feel vulnerable and alone. We often do things together as a family, which I am grateful for, as not all of my friends seem to have such a close relationship with their relatives. Family meals, watching TV in the evening together, etc. are all things that I am grateful I am able to do, especially as two years ago we were told that we should expect for my father to no longer be with us.

Christmas 2012 - thankful that my father was able to spend it with us.

3. River & Consequences of Owning a Dog

I am grateful for my dog who, although has a lot of issues due to his background, makes my life so much better and is always there for me when I feel alone and upset. When I went to see him at the Border Collie Trust I instantly fell in love with him; he was such a timid and sad looking dog, probably due to suffering abuse as a stray from Ireland. Despite all this I saw how he took a liking to me when I took him for the initial walk around the centre, and now six months on he is now a healthy weight and wags his tail at the first sight of one of us entering the room. He is becoming a competent and lovely dog as a result of the work of the Trust's volunteer coordinator, Tina Holmes, who lives locally. 

As a result of River both me and my mother have become volunteers for the Trust and often attend agility shows and fundraising events as members of staff who assist with generating funds for the charity. This has been a lovely opportunity and has made me feel a better sense of importance about the work they do, and has also helped me to feel better about myself.

4. Intelligence

I am grateful for my intelligence, which I seem to have been passionate about since being failed and messed around by my school. I have always considered myself as an intelligent person, and when it came to those who were supposed to help you flourish with your abilities I found that this was not the case, therefore taking the initiative to do something about it. Years on I am now in my final year of an LLB - Law Degree, on good track to gaining a 2:1 overall. 

This links to my family; of whom my mother was a well respected senior manager across the entire of Derbyshire for the learning disabilities division of Derbyshire County Council, and my father, whom was a head of department throughout his career for both mathematics and information and community technology at Merrill Academy, Derby. My parents have always pushed me since a young age to try and reach my potential and become the best I can possibly be at what I do, and I really would like to think that I am achieving this.

5. My Perseverance

As with my intelligence, where I have persevered to get to the position I have today, I am also proud of my perseverance in general. I have suffered multiple mental illnesses throughout my life, but to this day I feel strong and in a much better position than I have previously. I have had thoughts of ending my life in the past, attempted suicide, self-harmed, and have been diagnosed with moderate social anxiety which has impacted every single thing I do and has made my life extremely difficult. I made the decision to begin phasing myself off medication about two months ago, and I am now in a position where I feel very positive and happy with the future and with myself at this current stage. 

I almost lost my father in 2012, had a car accident just a month after, had my mother go into hospital, lost my cat of 13 years less than a year later, all whilst being on medication for moderate to severe depression, but despite all of this I took every day as it came and got to the point where I started the slow process to a recovery. I had very little support from the NHS, who didn't seem interested apart from prescribing me a continual prescription of tablets, and also despite having support from parents, they did not have a complete understanding of how my depression and anxiety effected me.

I also persevered with my current course, I was originally not accepted onto the LPC due to a lack of UCAS points. Once I was accepted to the university on a different course I approached the School of Law & Criminology to ask for a chance to prove myself; I was given a task of completing an induction file that everyone else had two weeks to do in just 4 days! I succeeded and this secured my space of the LLB and has allowed me to continue to focus and be determined to succeed through the subsequent years in university.

A quote from one of my inspiration figures - Steve Jobs, CEO & Founder of Apple

6. Being Able to Drive & My Car

I am grateful for being able to drive and for being fortunate enough with having a car. I passed my driving test 6 months after my 17th birthday in 2011 and have been driving ever since, and it has made my life infinitely more easier from things as seeing friends, to commuting to university, and due to the fact I barely drink, as a taxi for my parents! I got my first car in 2011, a 2009 Ford Fiesta, then upgraded to a 2013 Fiesta in March 2013, and just a week ago upgraded to my first SUV, which is wonderful for feeling safe on the road due to the higher driving position, and also gives my dog a perfect car for having plenty of space to be comfortable in when going to the vet and going for a walk around the countryside. 

I know that not everyone, even if they are fortunate to afford driving lessons, can afford to even own a car with all the included additional funds need for tax, fuel, insurance, etc. so I am extremely grateful that I am able to.

On terms of my volunteering too, I'm also able to assist immensely with the fundraising due to the sheer size of the boot of my car, which allows more than 15 banana boxes of merchandise to fit when the backseats are folded up flat.

My new 2014 Ford EcoSport SUV, a wonderful 'little' car!

7. My Friends

I am grateful to have some wonderful friends, from teenagers up to people in their 40's. My friends are so supportive and make my life have meaning, there is nothing I look forward to more than seeing my friends! Although I often find myself busy with university, personal issues, and just generally attempting to relax without leaving the house, I cherish every moment I get to spend with those closest to me. My parents also know some lovely people, who I manage to get along with.

This blog post was nominated to me by one of the most loveliest bunch of people I have met - the Mawers. I met Tasha in 2011 and over the years we have become best friends, and through her I have met some lovely people - especially her family who are all such wonderful and lovely people. It is not uncommon in this world to see a lot of selfish and arrogant people, but when I met Tasha and got to know her family I instantly felt as though I had met people who make the world a better place. Knowing that I have friends like these make me so grateful and has made me feel a lot more positive about life as a whole.

Tasha, Kim, Alex, Kate, and Hannah - some of my lovely friends

8. Financial Position

I am extremely grateful to have been born into a rather well off upper-middle class family, which has an impact on a lot of the materialistic things I have listed in this blog post as having a significant benefit to my life. We are lucky enough to have access to a wide range of items due to the area in which we live and due to work my parents have done throughout their lifetime. Although we are not the richest family in the world, we do often spare as much money as possible to good causes, which I am extremely proud - from donating to help charities such as RSPCA, British Heart Foundation and Cancer Research UK, to things such a buying a coffee for my friends or being able to give the items I replace to my friends at a fraction of the cost it would cost to buy from a retailer.

9. My Body

I am grateful to be physically fit and an overall healthy individual. I enjoy being active on a daily basis and working on getting in a fair amount of exercise on a daily basis, and this somewhat shows. I've started a balanced diet since the beginning of October 2014 to try and make sure I keep a healthy balance between fat intake, carbohydrates, and protein. As a result I feel very healthy and I am proud of my body. A few years ago I was underweight and felt really fragile, however now with the combination of exercise, weight training, and also eating a healthy amount of food daily, I feel very confident as a result and no longer feel like I am vulnerable and unable to do certain things due to being too weak. 

Working out and eating right has made me proud of the body I have today.

10. My House

I am grateful to live in a comfortable environment and have a moderately large house to call home. My room is my sanctuary of the house, and having refurbished it in 2012, I feel as though I have a safe an comfortable area that is just for me. My parents have spent many years improving the property and as a result we now have a very nice garden, comfortable living room, modern bathroom, and I have my own luxury feeling room that houses my computer, my smart TV and of course my wonderfully comfortable bed! 

My wonderful room - designed by me, and completed by my father in 2013.

11. The Internet

I am grateful for the Internet, and all of the capabilities it has created; connecting to new friends, keeping in contact with the ones that live locally or have moved away, finding new recipes for cooking, researching for assignments, making purchases from the comfort of my own home, and much, much more. Since I also own an iPhone and iPad I'm also able to take advantage of this wonderful technology literally anywhere I am; from the coffee shop, walking in the countryside, or even in the car (not whilst driving of course, strictly legally!).

12. Food

I am grateful to be living in a country which has a wide choice of cuisine available: Indian, Italian, Mexican, Chinese, American, all of these are readily available by either going to the local supermarket or by visiting restaurants such as Frankie & Benny's, Wing Wah Chinese Buffet or the 50s American Diner.

I absolutely love food, although I focus on eating healthily a lot of the time, I enjoy being able to indulge with foods available such as authentic Italian pizzas and big American dishes served with a bucket load of proper American-style fried chips!

Good ol' Vanilla Float with a Chicken, Bacon and Cheese burger and curly fries - American 50s Style.

13. Nature

I am grateful for the world in which we live and specifically the nature we are surrounded by - from the trees we walk by and see swaying delicately in the breeze, to the many different species of animals that add life to the world. 

I love walking and every Friday I walk for an hour and half around Markeaton Park in Derby, this not only helps me to feel healthy physically by getting fresh air into my lungs and building on my lower body muscles, but also helps me mentally by making me feel at ease and relaxed by the green grass, the ducks, the trees and the flow of the water of the lake.

Derby is my comfort place, and it is my every intention to move to the city sometime within the not too distant future, and with Derbyshire offering a lot in terms of nature, as well as the Peak & Lake Districts being a relatively small drive away, I feel as though I live in a beautiful world where even the most natural locations can still be found in built up areas.

A mandarin drake - a rare sight of a beautiful duck spotted in Markeaton Park.

14. My Apperance

I'm grateful to be happy with my looks and with my appearance. I am happy with my body shape, my face and bone structure, and with myself as I am now. I have enhanced (in my opinion) my appearance as well with the addition of tattoos and piercing, I have had a half sleeve since last summer and I plan on having the other one done for my 21st birthday. I have had my nipples pierced for over a year now and they are my little babies, I love them! My snakebites have been a part of me since 2012 and I love them, they are like a part of me and although subtle I think they compliment my face nicely.

One of my most recent pictures, my purple fringe is as much a part of me as my snakebites!

15. Respect

Further to my previous point, regarding my friends and my university course, I am now in a position where I feel as though I am well respected. A few years ago I was surrounded by false friends and was in a school where only a handful of teachers put the effort in for me to achieve my best, where others simply had no time for me and didn't want to bother to push me to achieve my potential. 

This is completely different now, when I go and see my friends or make an appointment with a lecturer at university I feel as though I am well respected for all of my accomplishments, and I feel as though my lovely personality has made many people like me and look up to me. This is all I have ever really wanted, and as a result my confidence has increased twofold to what it once was.

Return

So I've kind of neglected my blog for quite a while now. I don't think I've posted in about 4-5 months. I'm not too sure why. I think I just got distracted and exams and summer have kept me busy. 

A lot has happened since I last blogged, I won't put this all into one post, mainly spread it about between different posts. 

I just got my new iPhone 6 today and the larger screen size and the sheer speed of it and the Internet should mean I'll enjoy blogging from it, unlike the iPhone 4s I've been using the last few weeks that is impractical due to its small screen size. 

So yes, I'll be returning to my blog shortly and hopefully have some interesting posts to make.